I think this article is just as much for me as my readers. It has only been three weeks under the American First Reich. I know it is tempting to shut down. There are days I feel like I’m rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic.
So how do we pull through this? This has only just started and the blitzkrieg of bullshit coming out of the White House has all of us dealing with whiplash. It’s been hard picking any one thing to write about. I want to scream sometimes. Then my wife said something that stuck out for me. “Joy is punk as fuck right now.” She’s right. We need joy right now. Not fleeting happiness, joy that comes from deep inside. But where do we find joy in all of this?
I started racking my brain for where I could turn for answers. I then went where I often go for answers. Some of my heroes. Men who practiced strength through peace, positive masculinity, and always standing for what was right. Men who through everything always exuded a sense of real joy.
Mr. Rogers
“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.’”
- Fred Rogers
A large portion of my moral compass comes from Mr. Rogers. His kindness and eagerness to learn and become better every day informs much of who I am today. No matter what he faced, he always taught kindness through action. He was creating a generation of helpers.
Look for the helpers, and where you can, become a helper. Give to charities that help people being targeted by Trump’s edicts. There are many wonderful charities that fight to protect human rights here and abroad who will be stretched much further now that the US has abdicated its humanitarian duties. You don’t have to donate money, you can also donate time. Find local charities that help migrants, children, impoverished nations, the LGBTQIA+ community, and any other marginalized groups. Here are a few of my favorites in no particular order.
There are so many worthy organizations out there. Find one and put in the work. Helping others in need gives back to the helpers. There is a strong boost in emotion elevating hormones when you help others. It’s an evolutionary trait that rewards you when you do things that build community. Being kind to others has real, tangible health benefits to you.
Levar Burton
“We all wish we lived in a perfect world. And if we could make it that way, we would. But the world is not perfect. Sometimes bad things do happen, and occasionally, the world can be a scary place to be. But when we have each other, kindness, generosity of the human spirit and love will always triumph. And then we can get through even the toughest of times.”
- Levar Burton
Levar Burton taught a generation to love reading. He taught us a love of learning and a curiosity for the world. He made us want to reach for the stars. Most importantly, he taught us kindness. He to this day continues his mission to educate and bring joy to the world. Beyond being a kind educator he is also a fierce advocate for human rights. His message of love and kindness is key.
We only pull through hard times together. Be kind to each other. Give each other grace. This is not to say we give fascism any quarter, but where our differences don’t involve human rights we take a moment to understand each other before we pull out the pitchforks. When disaster strikes, we show up for our neighbors because that is who we are. We cannot let anyone take that from us.
Jerome Joseph Clarkson (My grandfather)
“The measure of a good man is not in how he treats the CEO. It’s in how he treats the janitor.”
- Jerome Joseph Clarkson
I was adopted into the Clarkson family as an infant. My grandfather never gave me a hint that I had been adopted. He loved me unconditionally, treated me with as much if not more love than his biological grandchildren, and it is his example I try to live up to every day.
His quote is one he drilled into me from as young as I can remember, not just in word but in action. We used to go to the day-old bakery outlet to buy bread, cookies, and hand pies. It was on a lower income side of town, but he loved a good deal and sneaking treats when no one was looking. I remember many occasions we’d walk in and see someone down on their luck outside the bakery shop on the way in. On those days he’d buy a second bag of his favorite things and hand them to the person outside along with whatever cash he had on-hand. He’d offer rides to the nearest shelter when he could. If they were a veteran he’d get them in contact with the VA and help them with anything they needed.
In 1952 he was in a head-on collision with his wife and two sons in his Packard. A drunk driver had crossed over the center line suddenly. His boys were okay but he had severe damage to his knees and his wife, my grandmother, went head first through the windshield. She suffered permanent brain damage. My grandfather who had landed at Normandy, taken a bullet to the face in Alsace-Lorraine saving his platoon from a machine gun nest, and won a Purple Heart, two Silver Stars, and a Bronze star before being sent home in 1945 now had two young sons on his hands and a wife who would never fully be able to be his partner. Doctors told him to divorce her, put her away, and find someone else. He instead chose to stay with her, caring for her until his death in 1989. His last act was cooking dinner for her.
Why do I bring up my grandfather? He was the happiest man I’ve ever known, despite a life of suffering and tragedy. It was his life of selfless service to others. He lived to help anyone he could. He loved everyone. He served others to express that love. That love fed him and gave him the resilience to face everything this world threw at him.
Conclusion
There is so much anger, hurt, hate, and suffering in the world today. I could shout, “Cry havoc and let slip the dogs of war!” Lord knows I want to. There may even be some catharsis in it. But it is not something we can survive on long term. We need real, sustainable ways to make it through. We need to come together. Reach out to your friends. Hold onto loved ones. Help each other. Be good to each other. Look for the helpers to see whom to emulate.
Look to those who pursue the path of strength through peace, who seek to heal, not destroy.
This is not to say we don’t fight. We fight like hell. We fight through rebellion, and when fascism fights to divide us, unity is an act of rebellion. Kindness is a form of protest. Joy is punk as fuck.
Be good to each other, and stay true to you.
This really spoke to me as someone affected by Trump's EOs, and as a helper. Helping others is my passion! I work in the healthcare field and I really want to be a caretaker that can give the best care to those I interact with. It feels so much more difficult to do now because I feel so burnt out and exhausted from fighting. All that to say, it's hard to help others when I need help in these times.